seasons

they come & go. they sometimes stick around longer than we'd like. sometimes they can't come quickly enough. they are cyclical. they are temporary yet always there. they are wanted then forgotten until the next one comes around. they bring change. they bring newness. they make us want to clear out our closets & clean house. they make us sniffle & sneeze more. they reinforce the need good-byes & hellos. they remind us that as we leave this stage, there's another one ahead. 

it's these cycles, these changes, these well...seasons which bring new life & change into being.

glendalough

it could be a school year, an illness, a relationship, a sport, a tv series, a milestone, or a new baby which brings in a new season into our lives. seasons bring in fall colors, or blooming buds, or chirping birds, or feet of snow. actual seasons bring change. they bring a turn of the calendar page, they bring something new, something long forgotten, something that's needed. it's seasons in our lives which bring space to reflect, space to remember, space to wish for what was but also to hope for what will be. so whether you're finishing up school, starting a new job, moving, having a baby, battling an illness or turning an unknown page, you're in a season. 

i sit back & watch the seasons in dublin. i see the cold rainy days of winter coming to an end, ushering in sun, flowers, & joy. i see a long easter break. people come & people go. holidays are taken, plans are made for the coming summer, the school year is wrapping up, & the list goes on & on. i guess, i felt "settled" & thought things would stay as they are; i was unaware i was in a certain season which was coming to an end. i saw routines & schedules, now those things i thought i knew are thrown out the window. they're being replaced with new routines, new schedules...new seasons. the change was unknown & uncomfortable but now recognized & embraced. for it's ebb & flow of life which keeps us moving, growing, & learning. what season are you in? a bad one, a good one, a challenging one, a joyful one, a long never-ending one? are you in between seasons? do you like the season you're in? how can you learn from this season?

glendalough monastic city

psalm 1:3 he is like a tree planted by streams of water that yields it fruits in its season, & its leaf does not wither. in all that he does, he prospers.
psalm 104:27-28 these all look to You, to give them their food in due season. when you give it to them, they gather it up; when You open Your hand, they are filled with good things.
ecclesiastes 3:1 for everything there is a season, & a time for every matter under heaven.
zechariah 10:1 ask rain from the Lord in the season of the spring rain, from the Lord who makes the storm clouds, & He will give them showers of rain, to everyone the vegetation in the field.
galatians 6:9 and let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up. 

great songs about seasons:
"seasons" by nichole nordeman
"seasons of love" from rent

quotes about seasons

• "if we had no winter, the spring would not be so pleasant: if we did not sometimes taste of adversity, prosperity would not be so welcome." -anne bradstreet
• "her pleasure in the walk must arise from the exercise & the day, from the view of the last smiles of the year upon the tawny leave & withered hedges, & from repeating to herself some few of the thousand poetical descriptions extant of autumn--that season of peculiar & inexhaustible influence on the mind of taste & tenderness--that season which has drawn from every poet worthy of being read some attempt at description, or some lines of feeling." -jane austen persuasion



glendalough upper lake

• "is not this a true autumn day? just the still melancholy that i love- that makes life & nature harmonize. the birds are consulting about their migrations, the trees are putting on the hectic or the pallid hues of decay & begin to strew the ground, that one's very footsteps may not disturb the repose of earth & air, while they give us a scent that is a perfect anodyne to the restless spirit. delicious autumn! my very soul is wedded to it & if i were a bird i would fly about the earth seeking the successive autumns." --george eliot
• "with so many trees in the city, you could see the spring coming each day until a night of warm wind would bring it suddenly in one morning. sometimes the heavy cold rains would beat it back so that it would seem that ti would never come & that you were losing a season out of your life. this was the only truly sad time in paris because it was unnatural. you expected to be sad in the fall. part of you died each year when the leaves fell from the trees & their branches were bare against the wind & the cold, wintry light. but you knew there would always be the spring, as you knew the river would flow again after it was frozen. when the cold rains kept on & killed the spring, it was as though a young person had died for no reason. in those days, though, the spring always came finally but it was frightening that it had nearly failed." -ernest hemingway
• "always in the big woods when you leave familiar ground & step off alone into a new place there will be, along with the feelings of curiosity & excitement, a little nagging of dread. it is the ancient fear of the unknown, & it is your first bond with the wilderness you are going into." -wendell berry

be near...but not too near

prayer room at the YMCA

i'm an introvert...there i said (errr written) it, it's out there! it's true, i'm an introvert. yet, i feel as though i'm an introvert trapped in an extrovert's body. an introvert stuck in a extrovert world. i get frustrated with myself when i feel as though i'm spending too much on my own & not enough with others. i feel guilty for saying no to invitations. i feel selfish if i just want to do something by myself. 

moving to another country, meeting new people literally everyday, & building community is very difficult & complicated as an introvert. i struggle with the balance of allowing myself to get away by myself to refuel & recharge with the need to converse & interact with others.

this struggle gets particularly challenging when i'm stressed or going through a tough situation. i need to push myself to interact with others yet i need to set aside time to be alone. it's a crazy balancing act that i haven't nor do i really believe i will ever master. it's this tug of wanting people to draw near but a push to keep them away. 

 get away in nature (view from phoenix park in dublin)

it's also a struggle having a calling/vocation/job (whatever you want to call it) which requires loads of human interaction.  i absolutely love people! i love talking with people, getting to know them, making them laugh, & even having tearfully deep conversations with them but it wears me out. it drains me & it doesn't hit me until it's over. i'm just not built to take it on without a massive amount of alone time to recharge. it's not that i'm doing nothing (though most of the time it feels that way), it's that i need that empty time to refuel in order to function. i need time to mull over things, to escape into my own thoughts, to get lost in my mental rambling, & to think things through. if i don't do this...life gets nasty, messy & frustrating. easier said than done, though! i need to remind myself that this extroverted world shouldn't bully me in to feeling guilty, anti-social, shy, a party pooper, or a debby downer! 

check out this TED Talk about "The Power of Introverts"! it has a great explanation of introversion & the struggle of living in an extrovert world. she (susan cain) speaks of many religious leaders who valued solitude, jesus being one of those. there are many times in the gospels when jesus goes away to be alone, to reflect, to pray, & just get away.

i got away on the adriatic sea in croatia

luke 5:15-16 "but now even more the report about Him went abroad, & great crowds gathered to hear Him & to be healed of their infirmities. but He would withdraw to desolate places & pray."
mark 1:35 "rising very early int he morning, while it was still dark, He departed & went out to a desolate place, & there He prayed."
mark 6:30 "He said to them (the disciples), "come away by yourselves to a desolate place & rest a while." (this was just before He fed the 5,000)

before jesus even started His ministry, He spent 40 days in the wilderness. so before He ever healed, preached, or ministered He spent 40 days BY HIMSELF, away from others! then when He actually began His ministry, He chose a small number of close friends/followers/disciples with whom He spent a majority of His time. yes, He spoke with crowds & traveled far & wide to meet loads of people but He did so with alone time intermixed. one of the last things He does before He was arrested & crucified was to pray in a secluded place (garden of gethsemane in matthew 26:36 & mount of olives in luke 22:39-41) with His close friends. i think sometimes we miss the importance of taking time in solitude, in prayer, & in our own minds.

quotes about introverts:

• introverts, in contrast, may have strong social skills & enjoy parties & business meetings, but after a while wish they were home in their pajamas. they prefer to devote their social energies to close friends, colleagues, & family. they listen more than they talk, think before they speak & often feel as if they express themselves better in writing than in conversation. they tend to dislike conflict. many have a horror of small talk, but enjoy deep discussions. -susan cain
• when introverts go to church, we crave sanctuary in every sense of the word, as we flee from the disorienting distractions of 21st century life. we desire to escape from superficial relationships, trivial communications & the contrast noise that pervade our world, & find rest in the probing depths of God's love. -adam s. mchugh
• in a gentle way, you can shake the world. -gandhi
• don't think of introversion as something that needs to be cured...spend your free time the way you life, not the way you think you're supposed to. -susan cain
• let's clear one thing up: introverts do not hate small talk because we dislike people. we hate small talk because we hate the barrier it creates between people. -laurie a. helgoe
• knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom. -arisotle
• i have to be alone very often. i'd be perfectly happy if i spent saturday night until monday morning alone in my apartment. that's how i refuel. -audrey hepburn
• closed in a room, my imagination becomes the universe, & the rest of the world is missing out. -criss jami
• inside was there she lived, physically & mentally. she resided in the horn of plenty of her own prodigious mind, fertilized by inexhaustible curiosity. -tim lahaye
• leave an extrovert alone for 2 minutes & he will reach for his cell phone. in contrast, after an hour or 2 of being socially "on," we introverts need to turn off & recharge. my own formula is roughly 2 hours alone for every hour of socializing. this isn't antisocial. it isn't a sign of depression. it does not call for medication. for introverts, to be alone with our thoughts is as restorative as sleeping, as nourishing as eating. our motto: "i'm okay, you're okay--in small doses." -jonathan rauch
• how intense can be the longing to escape from the emptiness & dullness of human verbosity, to take refuge in nature, apparently so inarticulate, or in the wordlessness of long, grinding labor, of sound sleep, of true music, or of a human understanding rendered speechless by emotion! -boris pasternak
• introverts paradoxically pull away from culture & create culture. -laurie a. helgoe
• his retreat into himself is not a final renunciation of the world, but a search for quietude, where alone it is possible for him to make his contribution to the life of the community. -c. g. jung

tears

we shed them at weddings, at graduations, at birthdays, at funerals, at happy endings, at milestones, at good jokes...when we're happy, when we feel true joy, when we rise, when we fall, when we're sad, when we feel deep sorrow...tears.

the word "tear" also means to pull apart. to be conflicted between two things. to be pulled in two directions. 

i've been feeling this word the past week. i received a "save the date" for a wedding (you know who you are!) & walked in the house with it in my hand only to burst into tears. the tears were tears of joy for the blessing of their marriage but also tears of sadness that i won't be there to witness it. thus i felt torn. i felt torn between two places, between two feelings, between two countries, between two communities, between two lives almost. 

pieces of my heart are across a giant ocean. pieces of my heart live here in dublin. pieces of my heart are carried by people around the world, some of whom don't even know they have these pieces. tears of sadness come when i think of these pieces. when i think of the distance between all of them. tears of joy come when i think of those who carry them & their impact on my life. there are tears in our lives. 

one of my favorite bible stories is the when the woman washes jesus' feet with her tears. the story is in luke 7:36-50 & i love the imagery of the story. it's a story of a woman expressing herself & her relationship with jesus through tears. you can just picture her bending down, so emotional she begins to cry. she's literally at jesus' feet weeping (for what it's not clear but i'd like to think it's a mixture of joy & sorrow). this story is a story of amazing grace, incredible mercy & an outrageous love. she brought all she had to the feet of the One who saves & her faith in Him saved her. despite her sinfulness, she brought all she had to the only One who could wash it all away. her sacrifice of all she had, including the weight & vulnerability of her tears, brought her to the savior's feet & set her free.

then in revelation 21:4 we are told that when christ returns, every tear will be wiped away. the magnitude of that truth is breathtaking & ironically tear jerking. it's an incredible thing. He will wipe away all the death, pain & mourning. all the separation from each other & from Him will be stitched back together. He will dry our eyes. He takes our tears.

quotes on tears

• but there was no need to be ashamed of tears, for tears bore witness that a man had the greatest of courage, the courage to suffer. –viktor e. frankl
• perhaps our eyes need to be washed by our tears once in a while, so that we can see life with a  clearer view again. –alex tan
• i think you have to pay for love with bitter tears. –edith piaf
• there is a sadness in tears. they are not the mark of weakness, but of power. they speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues. they are the messengers of overwhelming grief, of deep contrition, & of unspeakable love. –washington irving
• beauty of whatever kind, in its supreme development, invariably excites the sensitive soul to tears. -edgar allan poe
• tears are the silent language of grief. –voltaire
• there are more tears shed over answered prayers than over unanswered prayers. -saint teresa of avila
• men must live and create. live to the point of tears. -albert camus
• joy's smile is much closer to tears than laughter. -victor hugo
• heaven knows we need never be ashamed of our tears, for they are rain upon the blinding dust of earth, overlying our hard hearts. i was better after i had cried, than before—more sorry, more aware of my own ingratitude, more gentle. –charles dickens
• he wanted to cry quietly but not for himself: for the words, so beautiful & sad, like music. -james joyce
• my eyes were glued on life & they were full of tears. -jack kerouac
• he wept, & it felt as if the tears were cleansing him, as if his body needed to empty itself. -lois lowry
• but smiles & tears are so alike with me, they are neither of them confined to any particular feelings: i often cry when i am happy, & smile when i am sad. –anne bronte

heart for the city

chicago, illinois

the diversity
the towering skyscrapers
the crowds
the smells
the cars rushing by
the culture
the people with their noses in maps
the constant change
so much to do & see
halting for a tourist who suddenly stopped to take a picture
seeing people dragging luggage
observing groups protesting or promoting their cause
feeling so alone in the sea of faces (loads of people unlike you)
feeling so alive in the hustle & bustle (loads of people like you)

indianapolis, indiana

feeling overwhelmed by the amount of people touching you
feeling deep despair for those on the ground with a cup of clinging change
discovering markets where you can buy everything under the sun
tapping your foot to street musicians who litter the city & fill it with eclectic sounds

it's where history is made & preserved
it's where the new & old collide
it's where transportation ranges from bicycles & one's own feet to double deckers & taxis
it's where statues immortalized heroes, leaders, rebels, & artists
it's where governments meet, conferences are had, concerts, sporting events, parades, all commence

prague, czech republic

it's the contrast of cities which compels me to love them. the idea you can see a man in a tux hop out of a sports car onto a sidewalk where a man is sleeping on a cardboard bed. the idea you can walk by a beautifully laid out park only to be bombarded by run down housing complexes. the idea that you can hear more than 3 languages being yelled, whispered, or mumbled on one bus. the idea that you can see some of the most well known art in a glamorous gallery only to walk out the door to find a street artist creating sand art on the ground. the idea that you can walk down one street & smell freshly baked bread, newly roasted coffee, dog poo & vomit. the idea that you can imagine other worlds as you enter into the cinema or theatre only to be greeted with the often rude reality as you walk out the door. the fact that some days, i absolutely love living in a city with all the light & life it brings but others i hate the darkness & death that is present.

as i live in the city of dublin, (having grow up on 86 acres of mostly cornfields & ponds) it keeps taking pieces of my heart. it captures my thoughts, my imagination, & my soul. all its character, all its detail, all its history, all its complexities suck me in to this vortex of wonder.

new york city, new york

timothy keller has a lot to say about cities

• check out this video & check out this website 
• WATCH THIS ONE on god's global urban mission. 300 years ago, less than 3% of people lived in cities, now, more than half the world lives in a city.

here's a link to christianity today's website on urban ministry.
here's an article titled, "why cities feel glorious."

quotes about the city

washington, d.c.

• "i love new york, even though it isn't mine, the way something has to be, a tree or a street or a house, something, anyway, that belongs to me because i belong to it." -truman capote
• "what strange phenomena we find in a great city, all we need to do is stroll about with our eyes open. life swarms with innocent monsters." -charles baudelaire
• "for those who are lost, there will always be cities that feel like home." -simon van booy
• "walkers are 'practitioners of the city' for the city is made to be walked. a city is a language, a repository of possibilities, & walking is the act of speaking that language, of selecting from those possibilities. just as language limits what can be said, architecture limits where one can walk, but the walker invents other ways to go." -rebecca solnit

  

  london, england
  

• "with cities, it is as with dreams: everything imaginable can be dreamed, but even the most unexpected dream is a rebus that conceals a desire or, its reverse, a fear. cities, like dreams, are made of desires & fears, even if the thread of their discourse is secret, their rules are absurd, their perspectives deceitful, & everything conceals something else." -italo calvino
• "the city gives even to children a sophisticated look that baffles the casual psychologist." honore willsie morrow
• "the city blew the windows of my brain wide open. but being in a place so bright, fast & brillant made you vertiginous with possibility: it didn't necessarily help you grasp those possibilities. i still had no idea what i was going to do. i felt directionless & lost in the crowd. i couldn't yet see how the city worked, but i began to find out." -hanif kureishi

  

  san sebastian, spain

• "it was a cruel city, but it was a lovely one; a savage city, yet it had such tenderness; a bitter, harsh, & violent catacatacomb of stone & steel & tunneled rock, slashed savagely with light & roaring, fighting a constant ceaseless warfare of men & of machinery; & yet it was so sweetly & so delicately pulsed, as full of warmth, of passion & of love, as it was full of hate." -thomas wolfe
• "a city isn't so unlike a person. they both have the marks to show they have many stories to tell. they see many faces. they tear things down & make new again." -rasmenia massoud
• "this city is what it is because our citizens are what they are." -plato 

  

  edinburgh, scotland

• "a city is a place where there is no need to wait for next week to get the answer to a questions, to taste the food of any country, to find new voices to listen to & familiar ones to listen to again." -margaret mead 
• "a great city tends to spread out & lay bare to the public view in a massive manner all the characters & traits which are oridinarily obscured & suppressed in small communities. the city, in short, shows the good & evil in human nature in excess. it is in fact, more than any other which justifies the view that would make of the city a laboratory or clinic in which human nature & social processes may be most conveniently & profitably studied." -robert e. park 
• "i'm in love with cities i've never been to & people i've never met." -john green 



dublin, ireland

• "the city, as one finds it in history, is the point of maximum concentration for the power and culture of a community. it is the place where the diffused rays of many separate beams of life fall into focus, with gains in both social effectiveness and significance. the city is the form and symbol of an integrated social relationship: it is the seat of the temple, the market, the hall of justice, the academy of learning. here in the city the goods of civilization are multiplied and manifolded; here is where human experience is transformed into viable signs, symbols, patterns of conduct, systems of order. here is where the issues of civilization are focused: here, too, ritual passes on occasion into the active drama of a fully differentiated and self-conscious society." -lewis mumford
• "in cities you have more image of god per square inch than anywhere else on earth." -timothy keller

detroit, michigan

madrid, spain

amsterdam, the netherlands

if only in my dreams

i'm dreaming tonight of a place i love

even more than i usually do

and although i know it's a long road back

i promise you 

i'll be home for christmas

you can count on me

please have snow and mistletoe

and presents under the tree

christmas eve will find me

where the love light beams

i'll be home for christmas if only in my dreams

christmas eve will find me

where the love light beams

i'll be home for christmas

if only in my dreams 

if only in my dreams

as the holidays roll around, the thoughts of home cross our minds more often. we think about taking a plane, a train, a bus or a car to the place we call "home." there are numerous songs, poems, books & movies about this word...home...what is it?

home is...

where the wifi connects automatically,

where you can drink straight from the carton,

where family lives,

where a bookshelf full of your imaginary worlds reside,

where a room stores all your possessions,

where you can laugh & cry without worry,

where you're deepest desires & burdens can be shared,

where you welcome others,

where you make sweet memories,

where you get into bed each night,

where you fee loved & open to be yourself,

where you decorate the walls & put furniture,

the list goes on & on...

can it be more than one place? how long does it take to call a place home? can you have more than one home? is it even a place? is it a feeling? 

home is where the heart is

where you are, i am home

"when i look at you, i'm home." (dory speaking to marlin)

for harry, it's at hogwarts
for the weasleys it's the burrow
dorothy spoke of it while tapping her red shoes together saying, "there's no place like home"
home sweet home
homesick
homeward bound
home for the holidays

one of my favorite movies is garden state & there's a great scene about home...

andrew: you know that point in your life when you realize the house you grew up in isn't really your home anymore? all of a sudden even though you have some place where you put your stuff, that idea of home is gone.

sam: i still feel at home in my house.

andrew: you'll see one day when you move out it just sort of happens one day and it's gone. you feel like you can never get it back. it's like you feel homesick for a place that doesn't even exist. maybe it's like this rite of passage, you know. you won't ever have this feeling again until you create a new idea of home for yourself, you know, for your kids, for the family you start, it's like a cycle or something. i don't know, but i miss the idea of it, you know. maybe that's all family really is. a group of people that miss the same imaginary place.

"a group of people that miss the same imaginary place." for believers in Christ, there is a place we long to be. the place where He is & where He calls us to be. in john 14, Jesus says, "do not let your hearts be troubled. trust in God, trust also in Me. in my Father's house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. and if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am. you know the way to the place where I am going." 2 corinthians 5:1-10 speaks of our heavenly dwelling. it speaks of an eternal home we have in heaven. one which is not built by men, one which we long for, one which He has waiting for us. it is this home i find most comforting. this home is wherever He is. wherever we are, we are home in Him. we can rest in Him & find comfort in Him. so as i spend my first christmas away from "home" i will take great delight in knowing He is home. i will cherish the precious memories of past christmases at "home" & i will look forward to those yet to be made.

links to some songs about home...

switchfoot's "home"

birdy's "home"

dave barnes' "home"

quotes about home...

• winter is the time for comfort, for good food and warmth, for the touch of a friendly hand and for a talk beside the fire: it is the time for home. -edith sitwell
• thank you. mr. rochester, for your great kindness. i am strangely glad to get back again to you: and wherever you is my home-my only home. -charlotte brontë in jane erye
• the ache for home lives in all of us. the safe place where we can go as we are and not be questioned. -maya angelou
• i believe that one can never leave home. i believe that one carries the shadows, the dreams, the fears and the dragons of home under one's skin, at the extreme corners of one's eyes and possibly in the gristle of the earlobe. -maya angelou
• a true home is one of the most sacred of places. it is a sanctuary into which men flee from the world's perils and alarms. it is a resting-place to which at close of day the weary retire to gather new strength for the battle and toils of tomorrow. it is the place where love learns its lessons, where life is schooled into discipline and strength, where character is molded. - j.r. miller
• home is a name, a word, it is a strong one; stronger than magician ever spoke, or spirit ever answered to, in the strongest conjuration. -charles dickens
• for he came to perceive that since people were his study, his teachers, the objects through which he could satisfy his persistent wonder about life itself, his own being among others, wherever he lived for the moment, there was his home. pearl s. buck

tree at Christ Church

tree in Smithfield

tree on O'Connell Street

we got a christmas tree

we made it through the Santa Dash

identity

what defines us? how is our identity sculpted? what makes us who we are? our name, our nationality, our race, our gender, our family, where we live, where we're from, what we do for a living, our achievements, what we do when no one's looking, what we like, what we don't like, our memories, our past, our future, our friends, our spouse/significant other, our co-workers, the face looking back at us in the mirror, our fingerprints, our expectations for ourselves, others' expectations for us?

being in a new place requires you to meet a lot of people. i meet someone new almost everyday! lots of shaking of hands, sometimes a hug, & every so often, they don't understand my name because of the my accent (i then proceed to spell it & they get it, well...most of the time)! there's a lot of first impressions. lots of initial encounters.

we "look/search" for ourselves, we try to "find" ourselves, we size up one another, we get to know one another, we discover each others' identities. we're obsessed with "selfies" & revealing our "identity" to everyone who clicks on our profile. but what is our identity stripped down to its bones? who are we at the core of our being? what makes us that way?

i've found myself questioning my identity a lot. i question why i am the way i am. for i am not who i was & have yet to discover who i will become. but what makes me the "me" of today? i've found that the people i'm around have a lot to do with who i am. not in a way that is fake or misleading but in a way that i'm overly sensitive to who is around me (this affects me & those i encounter). my confidence soars through the roof if i have a dear friend nearby. i'm more of myself when i feel at ease or free to be me. i am more myself if i know someone else's identity. if i can relate to the person i speaking with then i feel more "at home" & i guess this is at the core of our humanity. we want to be accepted, loved, & feel a part of something.

so if you know me super well, you'll know i'm not the most patriotic person, hence my living the life of an "ex-pat"! but living in a country that's not your own you're faced with your nationality often. there are countless discussions i've had with people where the US or americans come up. truthfully, it's usually negative but overall people here love americans & are accepting. but the fact i'm american will never leave me. it's where i was born, it's where i can vote, it's where my (most of) family lives, it's where my accent comes from, it's the country on my passport. it has shaped my values, my assumptions, my expectations, my mindset, my worldview, etc. i can't escape it. it's part of me. it's a part i didn't choose much like a lot of other aspects of my identity. 

if there are parts of our identity that we can't control, change, or manipulate, then what's at the core of it? what's the basic substance of our identity? truthfully, i don't know, i don't have an answer to that question. i guess, right now, i feel like my core identity is a "child of God". from this seemingly simple aspect of my identity comes a lot of who i am, how i think, what i believe, how i treat others, etc.

what the bible says about identity:

• genesis 1:27, "so God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male & female He created them." we are made in the image of our Creator God. there's huge significance to this in terms of our role in this world, how we treat our bodies, how we treat others', etc.
• isaiah 43:1, but now thus says the Lord, He who created you, o jacob, He who formed you, o israel: "fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name, you are Mine. we are His. we are God's. He calls us by name & knows us better than we will ever know ourselves for He created us.
• john 15:15, no longer do I call you servants, for the servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all that I have heard from my Father I have made known to you. we are Jesus' friends, we are partakers in what He does, & He is close to us.
• ephesians 4:22-24, to put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life & is corrupt through deceitful desires, & to be renewed in the spirit of your minds & to put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness & holiness. old self vs. new self. we are renewed! how amazing is that! we are renewed from our old selves that are full of greed, pride, guilt, shame, & sin! we must put on our new self!
• 1 peter 2:9, "but you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for His own possession, that you may proclaim the excellencies of Him who called you out of darkness into His marvelous light. we are chosen. we are wanted by God. we are also called out of something into something else, something better. 
• 1 john 3:1-3, see what kind of love the Father has given us, that we should be called children of God; & so we are. the reason why the world does not know us is that it did not know Him. beloved, we are God's children now, & what we will be has not yet appeared; but we know that when He appears we shall be like Him, because we shall see Him as He is. & everyone who thus hopes in Him purifies himself as He is pure. holy cow, this passage is packed full of significant info on identity. the fact that we shall be like Jesus when He comes, that we are children of God, & it all has to do with God's love!

while thinking about identity, i found some great quotes!

• “man is not who he thinks he is; he is what he hides.” andre malraux
• “who is it that can tell me who i am?” william shakespeare
• "if you asked me now who i am, the only answer i could give with any certainty would be my name. for the rest: my loves, my hates, down even to deepest desires, i can no longer say whether these emotions are my own, or stolen from those i once so desperately wished to be." evelyn waugh
• "i am the combined effort of everyone i've ever known." chuck palahniuk
• "can you remember who you were, before the world told you who you should be?" danielle laporte
• "i am not what i think i am, and i am not what you think i am. i am what i think you think i am." robert bierstedt
• "it is a peculiar sensation, this double-consciousness, this sense of always looking at one's self through the eyes of others, of measuring one's soul by the tape of a world that looks on in amused contempt & pity. one every feels his two-ness--an american, a negro; two souls, two thoughts, two reconciled strivings; two warring ideals in one dark body, whose dogged strength alone keeps it from being torn asunder." w.e.b. dubois
• "be a bush if you can't be a tree. if you can't be a highway, just be a trail. if you can't be a sun, be a star. for it isn't by size that you win or fail. be the best of whatever you are." martin luther king, jr. 

aungier street (where the Y is) is looking festive

on the bus by myself...happens a lot because i get off/on at the last stop

still looks like fall despite the christmas lights

watching Gilmore Girls via a projector with a fire = awesome 

the custom house on the river liffey

comfort

this week, i've been sick & it's got me thinking about comfort. if you've ever been away from home or an unfamiliar place while sick, you know how it feels to be in discomfort while in an uncomfortable place. when all the remedies you usually use to get better aren't available or accessible. to be uncomfortable in a place you've yet to feel completely at home in (not a bad thing, just the reality).

what gives you comfort? what makes you feel at home? what causes you to smile with delight or sigh with relief? i found this word, "gezelligheid," which is a dutch (no, i don't know dutch) abstract noun, depending on context, can be translated as convivial, cozy, fun, quaint, or nice atmosphere, but can also mean belonging, time spent with loved ones, the fact of seeing a friend after a long absence, or general togetherness. such a great word! not really sure how to pronounce it but i like it. what is your gezelligheid?

for me, it's... a cup of delicious coffee/tea, a big bowl of spaghetti, jamming to some great music, laughing with someone who truly knows & loves me, cuddling up in a blanket with a great book, having dinner with my family around the table, times of worship, and falling on my knees to pray.

those last two strike/surprise me. i don't know if those would have been on my list of top comforts a year ago yet these two have crept in over the last few years to be a true sources of comfort for me. where do we find our truest comfort? is it in things? is it in people? is the answer ever prayer, the bible, or God? should it be? comfort is defined as a state of physical ease/freedom from pain or constraint or consolation for grief or anxiety. where do we find ease or freedom? what causes us to feel free or at ease? in whom do we find this freedom & ease?

the psalms are littered with words of comfort. psalm 23, a classic, paints a beautiful picture of comfort with a pasture, paths of righteousness, quiet waters, & His rod & staff. psalm 147 speaks of the Lord binding the brokenhearted. psalm 46 speaks of God being our refuge & strength, an ever-present help in trouble. psalm 73 says that God is the strength of our hearts & our portion forever. 

2 thessalonians 2:16-17 says, now may our Lord Jesus Christ himself, & God our Father, who loved us & gave us eternal comfort & good hope through grace, comfort your hearts & establish them in every good work & word. there is a sense of encouragement here. a genuine sense of the triune God cheering us up/on.

i really like what 2 corinthians 1:3-4 says, "blessed be the God & Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies & God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God." how great are the words, "God of all comfort." such reassuring & frankly, comforting words! no matter where in the world we find ourselves or whatever situation, the Lord is there to comfort us. whether we're sick, healthy, old, young, broken, optimistic, mourning, homesick, away from loved ones, in our favorite place, He's there to comfort us. He wants to be & is our comfort. we are to comfort others with that same comfort. the comfort that comes from Him is fed through us to others. we are to be comforted by Him to comfort others! He meets us in our afflictions to bring freedom & ease. may we rest in that comfort.

i'm continuing to find my way in this still slightly uncomfortable/unfamiliar city. here are a few pictures of the places i've been recently; places where i have found comfort in simply discovering their history & beauty. 

the long room at Trinity College

General Post Office on O'Connell Street

Garden of Remembrance near Parnell Square